Been tired throughout the whole week. Something to do with dark thoughts and grey moods, I suspect, considering that I have dreams of the similar nature, of the same topic over and over whenever I try to sleep early.
And then it becomes a habit to sleep late.
Recently, those thoughts keep coming back.
What if I had been able to grab hold of the opportunities?
What if I had been more aware?
What if I had been bolder and more willing - despite the twists in my personality - to step forward and break through the walls, perhaps even a little forcefully but confidently?
What if I had went ahead?
What if.....?
Damn it....Too many 'what ifs'.
It's difficult to let the past lie, considering how you were given affirmation and then....Nothing.
Sometimes making a decision and carrying it out are two different things.
Maybe it will be as the saying goes, that 'Time will heal old wounds'.
But if there's a way to simply wipe everything away....As much as I hate to say it...
So be it.
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