As one would know, a wheel is often considered as being one of the most important inventions Man has ever made.
Without it, we wouldn't have cars, trains, wheelchairs, bicycles...Even passenger jets.
Without it, we wouldn't have the classical TV game show, 'The Wheel of Fortune', nor Robert Jordan's famous novel series 'The Wheel of Time'.
But more than that, the wheel also becomes an important metaphor.
In this case, perhaps one would call it the wheel of Fate?
Simply put, people can sometimes go a full circle, a complete revolution (as in the wheel spinning one time completely) and feel that they are back at the same point, but actually they aren't.
The concept is rather hard to grasp, of course, because when one says someone has gone 'one whole round', it usually means he/she has returned to the starting point.
The other idea about this is better, of course. 'Full circle' has the meaning that someone has gone through a whole process of incidents/occurrences and has arrived at some point of completion.
-------------------
I feel that 'Full circle' more or less describes what I'm feeling now.
Had a great meeting and wonderful times of fellowship as well as some really meaningful self-reflection and insight on certain things. It made me realise certain things about myself.
1) I'm probably one of the most imperfect people around...but then again, there are probably many others who think that way too.
2) I love people. I love company, and that is perhaps why I hesitate on making a decision as to whether I should stay or go, especially when the places we meet at is so far away from where I stayed.
3) After all the things that have happened, it feels like I'm back where I started....But perhaps not.
(3) Happens to be the most important thing at the moment, because it really feels like there's been a change. To put it bluntly, it feels like I won't be so affected by certain things so much already. Things that I dream of or treasure.
And I believe that despite my iniquities and the probable fact that every single friend or family member I have is at least ten times better/more qualified than I am, I can still go for them.
The notion of success has never crossed my mind as much as traffic lights have never crossed the road before, I think, and this is perhaps the first time I really, really, really felt that in my heart, things could change.
I don't see them now, of course, especially if those are long-term dreams or hopes. But rather than harp on wanting it NOW, I rather think about taking those small, steady steps towards the goal, all the while making myself gain qualities that I would like to see in some of the things I think of.
Difficult? No one said it was easy, so yeah. Not especially when the facts remain that I have a lot to learn despite my age, my looks are far from desirable, my spiritual life isn't exactly the best example and I'm not exactly the most exciting, jovial, likable person around.
YET I think God can bring me there, and everything I have been facing is preparing me for those things.
How will it turn out? I don't know. Will there be disappointment? Probably. Will there be pain? Surely, for someone like me.
BUT I'm comforted in being reminded time and time again that God is always there, just as He was with Joshua when he embarked on the campaign to take the Promised Land.
And considering the fact that the prompting, the visions, the dreams, the answers, the presence had the same comforting, awe-inspiring, reassuring feel and surety, how can it be wrong?
And so the spiritual and physical healing continues.
May it all bring glory to Him forever and ever.
No comments:
Post a Comment