I like the word 'Help'. So many different connotations to it.
I like it especially when it is a verb. Sentences like "Can I help you?", "Let me help you", "Help is on the way." Most of these release positive vibes more than negative.
There are moments where 'help' becomes negative too. To some, asking for 'help' can be seen as a sign of weakness. To others, you don't want any 'help' because of the possible invasion of privacy. There are things so deep, so dark that you don't want to share, because people might think poorly of you. Because that can be a moment of weakness, where if you reveal those difficulties and secrets, you are not sure if they would think lesser of you, or if they would betray your trust and divulge those things.
Everyone finds it difficult one way or another, I believe. I do as well, which is why I hide things from people who might truly want to help. And on the other hand, when the person who genuinely wants to help is rejected one way or another, he gets hurt, even if its the slightest of injuries. He feels that even though he's trying to help just for the sake of helping, and NOT for any other agenda, the other party hates him or doesn't need him.
A bit sensitive, yes? I think so too. but that's the way things work sometimes. It is also perfectly understandable that you feel uncomfortable with unveiling certain aspects of your life, or having someone whom you barely know and probably have absolutely no interest in, trying to help you even in the most mundane ways feels like he's intruded into your life. And you need to hide from this creep.
But Hiding and Solving The Problem are two different things entirely, are they not? I'm not so conceited as to say that whatever help provided would definitely solve your problems. Besides, it's really difficult for some people to accept help, whether it's their fear or pride or uncertainty or whatsoever.
But is rejecting help the solution? Do you think you can handle it all by yourself?
If so, then you are being conceited.
No man-no, let me rephrase that. No man or woman is an island. You can't do everything yourself.
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Be clear about things.
That was what I've been told about doing certain things. Like praying. Like helping others. Like asking for help. Like doing whatever I need to do.
So I wonder if I'm too condemning, too judgmental if I want to use that statement on other people, directly and indirectly.
Be clear about it. If I bother you, tell me. If you really don't need my help, just say it.
It will hurt, of course. It always does when people tell you that you're a bother. But the indirectness is doing to hurt even worse because it piles up, bit by bit. That's how the Enemy does things too...Piling small, disconcerting, negative voices in my mind bit by bit until they bring you down to your lowest point. Small signs of rejection can hurt a person's confidence and when it accumulates, it overflows and shows on the surface really well.
And so I shall remember to do that too. Be more direct, even if it's difficult.
Lest I forget the take out the plank in my own eye.
Thankfully, though, I'm learning more and more in how to trust the King. Everything's going to turn out fine, even if my concerns are still there, He's going to make it alright again.
Let's concentrate on the stuff that's more important, shall we?
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